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Talk About Las Vegas with Ira

Each week, Ira talks with the celebrities, entertainers, writers, and personalities who make Las Vegas the most exciting city in the world!

Each week, Ira talks with the celebrities, entertainers, writers, and personalities who make Las Vegas the most exciting city in the world!

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You are here: Home / Talk About Las Vegas Blog / SIGNS OF THE SIGNS

September 24, 2020 By Ira Leave a Comment

SIGNS OF THE SIGNS

Did you get a chance to drive down the Strip during the early stages of the pandemic? If you did, you probably suffered from that haunting feeling that Las Vegas had undergone a sea change (and a sea change is hard to pull off in the middle of the desert): No traffic, no people, no activity whatsoever.

Even though the gloom is starting to lift and the resorts have reopened, there’s no doubt that the times are a-changin’.  Lackluster visitation, the lack of live entertainment, the virtual elimination of the sacrosanct buffet…it’s a different world now. What better way to recognize these new realities than by acknowledging that our casino signs should be a-changin’, too.

Let’s try to reimagine some of  those signs for a brave new Vegas world:

Casino Parking Garage Sign: 

Free parking, just show your mask

Free parking. Now that’s a good sign.

Front Entrance Sign: 

Enter at your own risk

Not exactly welcoming, but casinos never had greeters at the door anyway.

Craps Sign: 

Don’t blow on the dice

Old habits die hard (sorry for the word play), and even compliant craps players will, by habit,  try to blow on the dice with their masks on. Time for a rolling-the-dice machine? Face Shield for players? 

Jackpot winner sign: 

Your choice: win a million dollars or a bottle of hand sanitizer.

We know 100% of the winners would take the million bucks, but nothing says casinos care like hand sanitizer.

Keno Sign: 

Do not return your crayon

Crayons are cheap and easy to replace.  All casinos employees have to do is just hand them out with gloves on. Better than that, request people to BYOC (Bring Your Own Crayon).

Buffet Sign: 

Ain’t happening

It’s either a sit-down meal or to-go. Blunt and to the point.

Showroom Sign: 

Maybe some day

Technically, you could open a showroom, but the entertainer would have to be comfortable performing before cut-outs borrowed from the Dodgers.

Bar Signs:  

Open today, maybe not tomorrow

This one’s tricky on a number of levels. Are you having food with that drink?; peanuts only?; are you drinking here or taking it to some other part of the casino? Do you know what day of the week it is?

Day Club Sign: 

Yes, we know masks don’t look good with bikinis, but we all have to sacrifice. 

This is the right kind of superficial message for partygoers who have made the ultimate concession of partying at a distance.

Convention Area Sign: 

Masked Balls only

Enough said, don’t call Ed.

Elevator Sign:

Choose your corner

Not sure how you social distance here.  Suggestions?

These are some ideas for sign changes that reflect our new reality. The question is whether any  casinos will use them  One thing we know for sure is that Las Vegas always adapts to changes, good and bad.  And it’s comforting to know that Las Vegas will never, despite everything, sign off.

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